Canteen man has a lunchbox. It is plastic: grey Or brown. It doesn’t make him happy And it doesn’t make him frown; it just IS (full of sandwiches) and lunches are okay. There’s nothing bad about them but there’s nothing that would say THIS IS FUN Because it isn’t And that isn’t what I like. … Continue reading KIDS GROWN UP
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My birthday is on February 1st, or 1st February, depending on how to like to write your dates out. I myself prefer FEBRUARY 1ST, because saying it out loud makes me feel like an American lady who wears only dark purple and is really big on incense. I don't know. I like February, minus the grey weather. … Continue reading Years of birthday tears
1) Drastic hair cuts aren't always a good idea, but it's worth trying them out anyway A couple of months ago, I had seven inches of my hair cut off. I kept it plaited in the glovebox of my car for a few weeks, marvelling over the blunt bit and saying "DOESN'T IT LOOK LIKE … Continue reading Things I learned in 2016
Most people watched The OC between the years of 2003 and 2007, and then moved on. They enjoyed the series and CONTINUED WITH LIFE, satisfied in the knowledge that Summer was off to save the world, Ryan was "hey kid, you need any help??"-ing like a champ and Seth was pretty happy being Seth. And … Continue reading An analysis of Marissa Cooper
Can you remember the first time you edited a photo of your face? I'm pretty sure that for me it was about 10 years ago, back in a simpler time when I spent approximately 23.5 hours a day writing passive aggressive bulletins and pressing F5 on MySpace. I saw other people's semi-professional-looking selfies and I … Continue reading Stop getting weird about filters, plz
My first part-time, post-university job was offered to me around three months after I graduated. I'd expected to feel accomplished and happy - I knew 'getting a job' was next on my list - but instead I said thanks, hung up the phone and promptly burst into tears. "What's wrong?" my boyfriend asked. In between … Continue reading The perks of being a grown-up
What do you call it? I swap between "laughy cry face" and "crying laughy face", but WE ALL KNOW THE FACE I MEAN. It's the emoji that we use in place of the "LMAO" of yore. It's the emoji that the cool I-NEVER-USE-A-SMILEY-FACE-AND-ALWAYS-END-MY-SENTENCES-WITH-A-FULL-STOP people judge and despise the most, apart from maybe the collection of … Continue reading In defence of the crying laughy face emoji
It's weird to think that Frozen came out almost three years ago. This is partly because time is bizarre and moves a hell of a lot faster than any of us would really like it to, and partly because thanks to Frozen's never-waning popularity, it hasn't really had chance to fade out of the limelight … Continue reading Why Frozen’s Anna is my insecure hero
About to have your tonsils removed? Considering it? Sitting at home post-op with a mouthful of ice and a deathwish? I had a tonsillectomy at the start of July and am now about 80 per cent recovered, which means I can actually get out of bed and write and think and I don't have to … Continue reading How to deal with an adult tonsillectomy
When I was a kid, my mum always used to tell me that skinny jeans would make a comeback. She didn't call them 'skinny jeans' at the time - I think she used the word 'drainpipes' - but either way, she promised me that one day I would ditch my baggy Etnies knock-offs and embrace … Continue reading Why, brows?